Is stress killing your happiness? Funny Engaged Quotes will help you release your day-to-day stresses and rise your mood levels.
Morning Quotes is the site to make your morning stress free and boost your mood levels to stay happy in your life. There are quotes to impress your loved ones and many more.
Some funny engaged quotes by famous people:-
Best Funny Engaged Quotes
- Love is like WiFi, it is in the air but not everyone has the key.
- Can I take a picture for you? So I can show Santa Claus what I want for Christmas.
- Love is sharing dessert when the other person has told you that they don’t want anything.
- I can’t find my pillow, do you share yours?
- I’ve lost my bed, can I sleep with you?
- The love is that you share your data with me when I have aired them in the middle of the month.
- Mr. Wonderful
- Chess should have taught you that with a bad move you can lose your queen.
- Love knocked on my door … but I was at the supermarket.
- There are men who treat you like Google, they only look for you when they want something.
- My belly is madly in love with you. My heart too, but my belly fits more love.
- God put in overtime when He made you.
- Love is like sneezing, no matter how hard you try to avoid it, it ends up coming out.
- Valentine’s Day is silly, but don’t forget about my gift.
- -Honey, tell me something that delights me. + Cow.
- You have something on your face. Oh no, it’s just the most beautiful smile I’ve ever seen.
- -Honey, tell me something that makes me see the stars. + Telescope.
- -Honey … + What? -You are so beautiful that I have forgotten what I was going to say to you.
- Sometimes I wonder what you saw in me to make you fall in love, but then I think I’d rather not find out.
- It may seem strange to you, but I’m going to marry you.
- You must be tired, because you’ve been running through my mind all day.
- Is your name Google? Because in you I have found everything I was looking for.
- If I keep looking at you like this, in the end I will need new eyes.
- Your mother must be a pastry chef, because a chocolate like you does not make anyone.
- Did it hurt when you fell from heaven, angel?
- Who was an aviator to fly to your dreams!
- Is your father a pirate? Because you are a treasure!
- Do you believe in love at first sight or do I have to go through again?
- You are like an iPhone, totally unattainable for me.
- Do we not have, by chance, a friend in common who can introduce us?
- What beautiful eyes you have, when can I see them again?
- Hello, I heard your body calling mine.
- Stop looking for your better half, I’m here.
- I don’t know how to kiss, do you think you could teach me?
- You look like you wanted me to come talk to you.
- We sure have a lot in common, why don’t we discover them together?
- What is the sun doing here among humans?
- I know you don’t know me, but I am the future father of your children. (Or the future mother of your children)
- I see that you have two hearts: yours and mine.
- Whoever was a thief to steal your heart and ask for a million kisses.
- My house is not a palace, but you could be the queen.
- Spring must have started, because you are the first flower I see.
- Can I use your phone? I want to call my mother to tell her that I have met the woman of my life.
- I’m new around here, can you tell me how I can get to your house?
- Do I study or work for you?
- Sorry, I lost my phone, can I have yours?
- Everything can be fun as long as it happens to someone else.
- Will rogers
- Laugh and the world will laugh with you. Snore and you will sleep alone.
- Anthony Burgess
These are best funny engaged quotes to release your bad stress and laugh out loud. Engaged Quotes can help you improve your love life and relationship.
Funny Engagement Anniversary Quotes
- Sometimes I forget my mistakes … what was your name?
- I have less desire to work than the one who named the berries.
- Time without you is me
- I hate that they talk when I interrupt.
- Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth.
- The other day they told me he was lazy. I almost answered him, but I was lazy.
- A day without sun is night.
- If the mountain comes towards you … run, because it is collapsing.
- Don’t trust those who get up early and in a good mood.
- Don’t give up on your dreams … sleep a little longer.
- I can’t stop thinking about you since I lent you money.
- Time is very valuable, waste it eagerly.
- I’m not fat, it’s just that my body can’t handle so much wisdom.
- I want to caress you in the rain, with a bare wire.
- I used to think I was indecisive, now I’m not sure.
- I need someone who understands me so that he can explain it to me later.
- Something with love? Shock absorber.
- Our friendship is going to be eternal. You know too much about me and I can’t let you get away.
- My God, give me patience because if you give me strength I will use it.
- The drug takes away your memory and … other things I don’t remember.
- There is a better world … but it is too expensive.
- If you walk into a friend’s house and your WiFi is automatically connected, keep it.
- Friends are like teeth, you lose them over the years.
- Santiago Ramón y Cajal
- Best friends are crazy, but the best moments are the craziest.
- Friends are like books, you don’t need many but the best.
- If you can’t call her at 3 in the morning, she’s not your best friend.
- A friend will always love you … even when you ask for her advice and then ignore it.
- My life without you would be the same. But still, thank you for existing.
- Fake friends aren’t there when you need them, but real friends are even in the soup.
- The worst thing about friendship is that you always hang out with people as crazy as you. Or was that for the best?
- They say that true friendship is a blessing … but that’s because they don’t know you.
- Yes, my friends may be crazy and gossipy, but that’s how I love them.
- The crazy and united friends will never be defeated.
- True friendship is not being inseparable, it is separating and still nothing changes.
- You are not crazy, you are just mentally funny.
- Behind a great woman like you, there is a crazy friend who constantly encourages her.
- Mr. Wonderful
- I didn’t want you in my life, but in the end I took a liking to you.
- A real friend will not cry with you, but will ask “Who do you want me to kill?”
- A true friend is one who helps you get up when you fall. After having laughed a long time.
- How are a good friend and a melon alike? Out of a hundred you try, only one comes out good.
- I’m your best friend, so ask me what you want … less money, please.
- Eyes that do not see … friends who tell you in detail!
- Call me crazy, but I’m starting to suspect that the love of my life is me.
- Don’t take life too seriously … otherwise you will never get out of it alive.
- Elbert hubbard
- Two words that will open all doors for you? Pull and push.
- There are people who continue to breathe because murder is illegal.
- Avoid looking fat: don’t look in the mirror.
Funny Engagement Quotes For Your Best Friend
- I don’t even have to pay the consequences of my actions.
- Are you like that or is it that they give you brain blackouts?
- I have no enemies, I have confused fans.
- We were happy for 20 years … then we met.
- I do not need funny phrases, to break me laughing I just have to look at your face.
- It’s not that I don’t listen to you, it’s that I have selective deafness.
- It’s not that he’s ugly, it’s that he has a bad appearance.
- He can look like an idiot and act like an idiot. But don’t be fooled. He’s really an idiot.
- Groucho marx
- Don’t worry if you can’t avoid temptations, when you are older they will avoid you.
- Hard work never killed anyone, but why take the risk?
- Don’t take life too seriously. You will not get out of it alive (Elbert Hubbard)
- Funny phrase that reminds us of the need to enjoy things instead of worrying so much about them.
- Having a clear conscience is a sign of poor memory (Steven Wright)
- Nobody is perfect. We all have something to be ashamed of.
- I like long walks, especially when annoying people take them (Fred Allen)
- Feeling harassed by someone we can’t stand is especially frustrating.
- I think I have found the missing link between the animal and civilized man. It’s us (Konrad Lorenz)
- This famous author lets us see that we really are not as civilized as we think .
- Everything is fun, as long as it happens to someone else (Will Rogers)
- Many people tend to laugh when a friend or colleague has a funny fall. But it is not so much for those who suffer from it.
- Always remember that you are unique. Absolutely the same as everyone else (Margaret Mead)
- In our quest to be unique and unrepeatable we often forget that others are too and that deep down we are more alike than we think.
- I am sure the universe is full of intelligent life. You were just too smart to come here (Arthur C. Clark)
- The author mocks in this phrase human stupidity in general.
- There are only two infinite things: the universe and human stupidity. And I’m not so sure about the first (Albert Einstein)
- I do not know how to mention the infinity of our own stupidity without mentioning this phrase by Einstein.
- An expert is someone who explains something simple to you in a confusing way that makes you think that the confusion is your fault (William Castle)
- Sometimes we make the simple extremely complex.
- Of course I understand. Even a five year old could understand it. Bring me a five year old kid! (Groucho Marx)
- Phrase that laughs at one’s stupidity and the stubbornness of not accepting it.
- Outside the dog, a book is probably man’s best friend, and inside the dog it’s probably too dark to read (Groucho Marx)
- The double meaning was a great resource used by this famous comedian.
- An archaeologist is the best husband a woman could have. The older she gets, the more interested he is in her. (Christie Agatha)
- Comment that mocks the concern for age, more marked in the female gender due to gender stereotypes.
- Working is not bad, the bad thing is having to work (Don Ramón)
- Phrase from Chavo del 8 in which we are comically reminded of the little desire to have to fulfill obligations.
- Age is something that does not matter, unless you are a cheese (Luis Buñuel)
- We give excessive importance to age for everything, when in reality it means almost nothing unless it is accompanied by experience.
- If only God gave me a clear sign! How to make a large deposit in my name in a Swiss bank (Woody Allen)
- A comical phrase that refers to the desire to make a fortune without trying.
- A celebrity is a person who works all his life to be known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized (Fred Allen)
- Criticism of the search and / or desire for fame on the part of the population, when most famous people end up getting tired of their multiple disadvantages.
- I hate housework! You make the beds, clean the dishes and six months later you have to start over (Joan Rivers)
- Phrase that makes fun of the very laziness of doing housework.
- I usually cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to my food (WC Fields)
- Small mockery or critic of satirical tone regarding the excessive consumption of alcohol.
- Money does not bring happiness, but it provides a feeling so similar that you need a very advanced specialist to verify the difference (Woody Allen)
- Cynical phrase that shows that although perhaps not happiness, a good economy allows us access to a large amount of goods, services and possibilities that most of us want.
- My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met (Rodney Dangerfield)
Funny Engagement Quotes Instagram
- Phrase that jokes about couple relationships and the monotony that can be established in them.
- Life is hard. After all, it kills you (Katherine Hepburn)
- Phrase that refers to the fact that death is part of life.
- When life gives you lemons, throw them in someone’s eyes (Cathy Guisewite)
- The author of the phrase pushes us not to fall into discouragement.
- Surely there are many reasons for divorces, but the main one is and will be the wedding (Jerry Lewis)
- This actor uses logic to find the main cause that divorces may exist: the need to be married in order to do so.
- Of course you must get married. If you get a good wife, you will become happy. If you get a bad one, you will become a philosopher (Socrates)
- Curious phrase due to the fact that whoever said it is one of the greatest philosophers in history . Socrates thus made fun of himself and the bad relationship with his wife.
- If you could kick the butt who is responsible for most of your problems, you could not sit for a month (Theodore Roosevelt)
- Roosevelt joked about the need to take responsibility for your own problems and not blame others for your mistakes.
- Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow (Mark Twain)
- Phrase that invites us to procrastinate .
- My idea of a nice person is a person who agrees with me (Benjamin Disraeli)
- In this sentence we see how we generally consider more acceptable and close to those people who agree with our opinions.
- I would like to take you seriously, but to do so would offend your intelligence (George Bernard Shaw)
- The author makes fun of his interlocutor with this phrase, pretending if he is acting seriously he would be being unintelligent.
- A successful man is one who earns more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man (Lana Turner)
- Joke that refers to traditional gender roles and topics .
- You never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be happy to make an exception (Groucho Marx)
- A somewhat sarcastic phrase that makes clear the little appreciation and desire to see another person again.
- Laugh and the world will laugh with you, snore and you will sleep alone (Anthony Burgess)
- Phrase that jokes with the annoyance that the fact that someone snores usually supposes for most.
- I find television very educational. Every time someone turns it on, I retire to another room and read a book (Groucho Marx)
- Mockery and criticism of the world of television .
- Those people who think they know everything are a real nuisance for those who really know everything (Isaac Asimov)
- This important author jokes in this phrase with presumptuousness that implies pretending to know everything.
- Love never starves; often indigestion (Ninon de Lenclos)
- This writer reflected that if love disappears, it is mainly due to disappointment or the appearance of other people, not by mere fading.
- Santa Claus had the right idea: he visits people once a year (Víctor Borge)
- Phrase that mocks the compulsory experience of making visits to the environment, although it does not really feel like it.
- To be young again I would do anything in the world except exercise, wake up early or be respectable (Oscar Wilde)
- This phrase expresses the little desire to strive for what we would like.
- My plastic plants died because I didn’t seem to water them (Mitch Hedberg)
- Criticism of today’s society’s excessive need to pretend.
- I went on a diet, vowed I would never drink or overeat again, and in fourteen days I had lost two weeks (Joe E. Lewis)
- Phrase that jokes about the lack of will when it comes to dieting or getting in shape.
- I exercise often. Look, just yesterday I had breakfast in bed (Oscar Wilde)
- Phrase referring to the difficulty and laziness of exercising when you are not used to it.
- “Don’t take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive. “
- “Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely with a beautiful and well-preserved body, but rather arriving skidding sideways, amid a cloud of smoke, completely worn and shattered, and proclaiming in loud: Ugh! What a trip! “
Hunter S. Thompson
- “I am sure the universe is full of intelligent life. He was just too smart to come here. “
Arthur C. Clarke
- “Life in a box is better than not having life, I hope. You would at least have a chance. You could stand there thinking: well, at least I’m not dead. “
- “Life would be tragic if it weren’t funny.”
- “The books say: she did this because. Life says: she did this. In books things are explained; in life, no. No wonder people prefer books. “
- “My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met. “
- “I am a wonderful homemaker. Every time I leave a man I keep his house. “
Zsa Zsa Gabor
- “Life does not imitate art, it imitates bad television.”
- “If cats looked like frogs, we would quickly realize how nasty and cruel those little bastards are.”
- “Happiness is having a big, loving, dedicated, united family that lives in another city.”
Got Married Funny Quotes
- “Laugh and the world laughs with you, snore and you will sleep alone.”
- “Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.”
- “I think if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade … And try to find someone whose life has given you vodka and have a party.”
- “I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know it, and they avoid me at parties. Sometimes, as a sign of great respect, they don’t even invite me. “
- “If this is coffee please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee. “
- “When life gives you lemons, throw someone in the eyes.”
- “Age is something that does not matter, unless you are a cheese.”
- “I am not afraid of death; I just don’t want to be there when it happens. “
- “I can resist anything but temptation.”
- “If you don’t know where you are going, any path will take you there.”
- “In this life, the only way to cope with problems is to laugh. Either they cry or they laugh, and I prefer to laugh, since crying gives me a headache. “
Marjorie Pay Hinckley
- “Wisdom comes from experience. Experience is often the result of lack of wisdom. “
- “Reality keeps ruining my life.”
- “If women operated the world we would not have wars, only intense negotiations every 28 days.”
- “Quitting smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I have done it thousands of times. “
- “A learning experience is one of those things that they say:“ You know, what you just did? Do not do it.”
- “If you don’t succeed at first, then skydiving is definitely not for you.”
- “I found the only way to look thin there: to hang out with fat people.”
- “There is no such beautiful sunrise that it is worth waking up to see it.”
- “I always wanted to ‘be somebody’, but now I realize that I should have been more specific.”
- “Life is nice. Death is peaceful. It is the transition that is problematic. “
- “There’s a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore like an idiot.”
- “If only God would give me a clear sign! How to make a large deposit in my name in a Swiss bank. “
- “A successful man is one who earns more money than his wife can afford. A successful woman is one who can find that man. “
- “Sometimes you go to bed in the morning and think, ‘I’m not going to make it,’ but you laugh inside, remembering all the times you’ve felt that way.”
- “You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black man, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss have the America’s Cup, France accuses the US arrogance, Germany does not want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are called “Bush”, “Dick” and “Colin”. Do I need to say more? ”
- “They say that marriages are made in Heaven, but thunder and lightning are also made in Heaven.”
- “A clear conscience is generally a sign of poor memory.”
- “Sometimes you know you have something to do with a girl because she is always wanting to fight with you. If the world weren’t so disastrous, it wouldn’t be. If the world were normal, a girl treating you well would be a good sign, but in the real world it is not. “
- “I may not have gone where I wanted to go, but I think I ended up where I needed to be.”
- “When courting a girl, an hour seems like a second. When sitting on a hot coal, a second seems like an hour. That is relativity. “
- “Let those who believe in telekinesis raise their hands.”
Kurt Vonnegut Jr.
- “A hangover is the wrath of grapes.”
- “If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans.”
- “I haven’t talked to my wife in years. I didn’t want to interrupt you. “
- “Design is a comic word. Some people think that design means how it looks. But of course, if you’re looking for more, it’s really how it works. “
- “To regain my youth, I would do anything in the world except exercise, wake up early, or be respectable.”
- “I’d rather be a rising ape than a falling angel.”
- “All the misfortunes of man are derived from the fact of not being able to sit quietly and alone in a room.”
- “I live on a one-way street that is also a dead end. I’m not sure how I got there. “
- “I like long walks, especially when taken by people who annoy me.”
- “This life is hard, but it’s harder if you’re stupid.”
George V. Higgins
- “If you are too open minded; your brains will fall out. “
- “We are stuck with technology when what we really want is just things that work.”
- “The problem with having an open mind is, of course, that people insist on trying to put things into it.”
- “I would never die for my beliefs as I could be wrong.”
- “If it were true that our species is the only one in the universe, then it would have to say that the universe aimed for something low and that it settled for very little.”
- “My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty years old. She’s ninety-seven now, and we don’t know where the hell she is. “
- “Children are smarter than any of us. Do you know how I know? I don’t know a single child with a full-time job and children. “
- “Prediction is very difficult, especially about the future.”
- “I don’t believe in an afterlife but just in case, I have changed my underwear.”
- “I’ve always wanted to go to Switzerland to see what the army does with those little red knives.”
- “If you live 100 years, you have made it. Few people die after that age. “
- “Sometimes I can hear my bones straining under the weight of all the lives I’m not living.”
Jonathan Safran Foer
- “If God wanted us to fly, He would have given us tickets.”
- “It’s a funny thing that when a man has nothing on earth to worry about, he goes and gets married.”
- “A celebrity is a person who works all his life to be known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.”
- “Wine is proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.”
- “Two things are certain: the universe and human stupidity; and I’m not sure about the first one. “
- Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people seem brilliant until they speak.-Steven Wrigh
- “God created the world, everything else is made in China.”
- “A bank is a place that lends you money if you can prove that you don’t need it.”
- “Silence is golden. Unless you have children, there it becomes suspicion. “
- “Sorry, if you were correct, I would agree with you.”
These are funny engaged quotes for you. I hope these quotes released your bad stresses in your life and made you happy.
Read all funny engaged quotes and stay happy in your life.